Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Rewrite: The most unforgettable event in my life

There are many unforgettable things that have happened in my life. However, the most unforgettable thing is the trip that I went to Liuchiu with my family last summer vacation. Liuchiu is located east PingtungCounty the port Southwest.

The first interesting thing is the sightseeing bus that we took. Sightseeing bus? You might want to ask “How many people are there in your family?”. I could tell you that there are thirty people. Besides, Liucuiu is an island so we had to take a boat. However, we ate the meal as soon as we arrived at the Pingtung. After that, we took the boat at once. It was so miserable that I have a seasickness. Although it only took thirty minutes to Liuchiu, it was like a year to me. What's more, I just threw up all the way. When we reached Liucuiu, we took the bus to go around the island. And because the island is not big, so it only took fourty minutes. There are also many natural scenic spots. "Flower Vase Rock" is a place that every sightseers would take a picture. "Beauty Cave" is a natural cave that composed of cay. "Black Devil Cave" is a cave with mysteries. I was so scared when I walked in there.

To sum up, the trip was really good except for the seasickness. Also, my mother suggests that we could go to Penghu next summer vacation. And I hope we would take the plane not the boat.

1 comment:

  1. Well done, Shu-Yun. I'm glad you made your revision so fast.

    I'm glad you further explained about your "big family". It is a lot clearer now. :)
    And wow! It's indeed a big family.

    Apart from that, I just noticed that I neglected two mistakes in my last comment. They are hidden in middle of the second paragraph:

    "Although it only took thirty minutes to Liuchiu, but it was like a year to me. What's more, I just threw up all the way. When we reached the Liucuiu, we took the bus to go around the island."

    ===>1. You don't need "although...but" at the same time.
    ===>2. You don't need a "the" to modify Liuchiu.

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